Compassion vs. Responsibility In Health
I strive for balance between compassion and responsibility, between the archetypes of the nurturing mother and strict father.
When responding to comments in Facebook groups, my timeline, or personal text messages, there are different ways to respond.
The extreme of the nurturing mother would be to show endless compassion, dropping everything I’m doing to offer empathy and hand holding reassurance, to express kindness, etc. At its extreme, its tolerating being a victim, with oh you poor thing, the world is so harsh someone or something should take care of you. Seeking support is fine, but you get the point.
The extreme of the strict father is to expect too much independence and blame people for their problems, like chronic fatigue. That’s not me, since I’ve been through chronic fatigue. I do have a bit of the strict father when I tell people to first follow instructions, professionalism before engaging emotionally, so I can give someone a free assessment of root causes. I am a man offering a masculine process of using logic to solve your damn problem. Take responsibility first by showing me you can be helped by reading and following instructions. I engage emotionally on video, that does not happen through text, and I don’t participate in texting culture, you can’t feel much there, and there is too much misinterpretation.
While the nurturing mother approach feels warmer, at its extreme it’s not realistic or productive. It risks affirming the process of complaining and being a victim. I am not independently wealthy and able to drop everything I am doing to serve people. When asking questions in comments no one is entitled to responses or obligated to respond.
Here is the real issue that requires people to step-up to the challenge of reading and thinking for themselves in order to get higher level help:
People are not going to get effective solutions to complex health solutions in Facebook comments. This generally assumes:
This is all about paradigm change. Absolutely the most important point is for people to see health solutions in a different way through a paradigm change—but no one wants to hear that.
It’s not just about compassion but asking people to take responsibility to see how they are thinking in a limited way. It’s confronting the ego and a simple minded mentality of someone taking care of them, a doctor savior, a technology savior, miracle supplement, etc.
The first step to getting help from me is to read. I don’t know why anyone would seek help from someone who they did not research to understand their methods. That’s impulsive emotional neediness. Investigate me like you are the FBI and someone’s life depends on it, that would be you and the life you are losing by continuing to make the wrong decisions about health. Your results reflect your criteria for what a solution looks like that you are unaware of.
Please be aware, that I spend most of my time educating people FOR FREE and that people are often not willing to put some effort in to receiving this. Many people think they understand me but very few do. They are caught up in their own world and assumptions, unfocused and still wanting to solve the problem the original way they expected, which is not working.
So I lean toward the masculine of asking people to take responsibility to read my writing so they can get FOR FREE what I have to offer. When people PM me they often want reassurance and explanations through chat. “Can you solve my problem?” I say probably but you have to go to my website to learn how I work, linked everywhere on my timeline. Please follow instructions at my website to get a free root cause assessment and prepare for a video call. I don’t know anything about them and they want a prognosis based on one symptom with the errors implied in that way of thinking mentioned above and explained everywhere on my website in my root cause framework I say I don’ t chat here but I offer them something better: video call if they prepare by following instructions. This is how I filter people out who are not serious. Basic questions are answered there. People who send me a message asking how much I charge as the first question never follow through.
I have to have good boundaries so I don’t get dragged into an energy draining and time wasting pit of neediness and being a victim when they take no responsibility for informing themselves. If they can’t follow simple instructions up front they sure cannot follow instructions later with a complete solution that is usually at first overwhelming. The people I work with take it on with discipline and orientation to detail and the big picture. That’s why they get results. It’s not being indecisive and taking things personally when asked to step up. Clients who succeed often send me an email answering all the questions for a free assessment as the first time I hear from them. Sometimes I have to direct them to read Health Coaching in 11 Steps because they have been so busy reading my content pages.
So I lean toward the strict father relative to what others want.
I am offering logic to solve your damn problem which is the ultimate goal
My compassion comes from listening to your many details. It comes from you reading that I have been through the nightmare of chronic fatigue so you see that I get and have no time to waste to put all my energy into complete solutions that work.
I’m a good fit for people who are bored with the existing ways of thinking, especially their own, and really want to learn something new that just keeps unfolding into more complexity and clarity. Something balancing systematic and simple while being sensitive to individual needs.
In addition, I am sociologist working on the gender issue of male and female by creating a new framework of masculine and feminine to explain moral and political issues and romantic relationships. Public discussion of these issues is characterized often by extreme confusion and hatred so I purse this mainly in private. Gender politics operates like a divide and conquer scheme to distract people from the deep state getting away with murder and wrecking the planet and our health through toxicity.
When responding to comments in Facebook groups, my timeline, or personal text messages, there are different ways to respond.
The extreme of the nurturing mother would be to show endless compassion, dropping everything I’m doing to offer empathy and hand holding reassurance, to express kindness, etc. At its extreme, its tolerating being a victim, with oh you poor thing, the world is so harsh someone or something should take care of you. Seeking support is fine, but you get the point.
The extreme of the strict father is to expect too much independence and blame people for their problems, like chronic fatigue. That’s not me, since I’ve been through chronic fatigue. I do have a bit of the strict father when I tell people to first follow instructions, professionalism before engaging emotionally, so I can give someone a free assessment of root causes. I am a man offering a masculine process of using logic to solve your damn problem. Take responsibility first by showing me you can be helped by reading and following instructions. I engage emotionally on video, that does not happen through text, and I don’t participate in texting culture, you can’t feel much there, and there is too much misinterpretation.
While the nurturing mother approach feels warmer, at its extreme it’s not realistic or productive. It risks affirming the process of complaining and being a victim. I am not independently wealthy and able to drop everything I am doing to serve people. When asking questions in comments no one is entitled to responses or obligated to respond.
Here is the real issue that requires people to step-up to the challenge of reading and thinking for themselves in order to get higher level help:
People are not going to get effective solutions to complex health solutions in Facebook comments. This generally assumes:
- That you can match symptoms to simple solutions, or one root cause, like toxicity, to a detox supplement, and that is all you need to do.
- There is a universal solution that can be recommended without customization to the individual, without energetic testing.
- That it’s ok to ask a question just because you have one, burdening the other to write an answer just for you, rather than look up that subject or investigate the poster: click to their timeline and website. Some people can’t figure it out. They are too lazy and have no research skills at all. I don’t think I can help those kind of people
- There are totally self centered narcissists who demand responses and attack you personally for not understanding that the world revolves around them and their needs. They are playing the role of the overbearing mother instructing me how to help hurt children. Amazingly, group moderators often give undue weight to the complaints of these outrageously negative and selfish people.
This is all about paradigm change. Absolutely the most important point is for people to see health solutions in a different way through a paradigm change—but no one wants to hear that.
It’s not just about compassion but asking people to take responsibility to see how they are thinking in a limited way. It’s confronting the ego and a simple minded mentality of someone taking care of them, a doctor savior, a technology savior, miracle supplement, etc.
The first step to getting help from me is to read. I don’t know why anyone would seek help from someone who they did not research to understand their methods. That’s impulsive emotional neediness. Investigate me like you are the FBI and someone’s life depends on it, that would be you and the life you are losing by continuing to make the wrong decisions about health. Your results reflect your criteria for what a solution looks like that you are unaware of.
Please be aware, that I spend most of my time educating people FOR FREE and that people are often not willing to put some effort in to receiving this. Many people think they understand me but very few do. They are caught up in their own world and assumptions, unfocused and still wanting to solve the problem the original way they expected, which is not working.
So I lean toward the masculine of asking people to take responsibility to read my writing so they can get FOR FREE what I have to offer. When people PM me they often want reassurance and explanations through chat. “Can you solve my problem?” I say probably but you have to go to my website to learn how I work, linked everywhere on my timeline. Please follow instructions at my website to get a free root cause assessment and prepare for a video call. I don’t know anything about them and they want a prognosis based on one symptom with the errors implied in that way of thinking mentioned above and explained everywhere on my website in my root cause framework I say I don’ t chat here but I offer them something better: video call if they prepare by following instructions. This is how I filter people out who are not serious. Basic questions are answered there. People who send me a message asking how much I charge as the first question never follow through.
I have to have good boundaries so I don’t get dragged into an energy draining and time wasting pit of neediness and being a victim when they take no responsibility for informing themselves. If they can’t follow simple instructions up front they sure cannot follow instructions later with a complete solution that is usually at first overwhelming. The people I work with take it on with discipline and orientation to detail and the big picture. That’s why they get results. It’s not being indecisive and taking things personally when asked to step up. Clients who succeed often send me an email answering all the questions for a free assessment as the first time I hear from them. Sometimes I have to direct them to read Health Coaching in 11 Steps because they have been so busy reading my content pages.
So I lean toward the strict father relative to what others want.
I am offering logic to solve your damn problem which is the ultimate goal
My compassion comes from listening to your many details. It comes from you reading that I have been through the nightmare of chronic fatigue so you see that I get and have no time to waste to put all my energy into complete solutions that work.
I’m a good fit for people who are bored with the existing ways of thinking, especially their own, and really want to learn something new that just keeps unfolding into more complexity and clarity. Something balancing systematic and simple while being sensitive to individual needs.
In addition, I am sociologist working on the gender issue of male and female by creating a new framework of masculine and feminine to explain moral and political issues and romantic relationships. Public discussion of these issues is characterized often by extreme confusion and hatred so I purse this mainly in private. Gender politics operates like a divide and conquer scheme to distract people from the deep state getting away with murder and wrecking the planet and our health through toxicity.
Get a
Free Assessment
of Your Root Causes
that's a link
Read more about: Health Coaching in 11 Steps
I work over video: Facebook, Zoom, Google, from Michigan, USA Hess.PaulC@gmail.com
Join me on Facebook where I blog post. FACEBOOK
Free Assessment
of Your Root Causes
that's a link
Read more about: Health Coaching in 11 Steps
I work over video: Facebook, Zoom, Google, from Michigan, USA Hess.PaulC@gmail.com
Join me on Facebook where I blog post. FACEBOOK
